I will be the first to admit, I am one to push through the pain. I have to get this or that done. I committed to going to this event and don’t want to let others down. There are times we should certainly wrap me up in bubble wrap, but please let me make that decision for myself. I have to live MY life the way I want to and can.
Every day I push through the pain. Most days it can take me an hour to get out of bed, other days the pain is so bad, I am better off staying in bed. I have been prescribed at least 12 different pain medications to try. Not one of them came remotely close to even touching the pain. I have one glass of beer and the pain is much less. The picture on the left is me dancing at a brewery a few weeks ago while enjoying a band. My husband took the picture, the next day showed it to me and said, “this was the moment I knew you weren’t going to be able to walk tomorrow.” That same night a friend turned to him and commented that I didn’t look like I was in much pain. He explained my trial of pain meds and how I try not to let the pain stop me.
I have had 12 orthopedic surgeries over the past 29 years. One doctor told me, “there’s no guarantee you will be able to ever drive again and you will likely have drop foot.” I went to the gym every day so that I could prove him wrong. The day after surgery, he said it was the largest muscle transfer he had ever done. I wasn’t going to let this surgery stop me, I was 21, I still had a whole life to live. I have had no issues with foot drop or driving. One surgery was because I tore a ligament in my shoulder using my elbows to scooch up in bed.
When does the bubble wrap go into play? When I walk down the street, dance like nobody’s watching, go to work or sleep? I may never know. Until that time comes, I will continue to push through the pain even if it means I can’t walk, grab things or lift my arms the next day or two. I’m only 50 years young and still have so much life to live and enjoy. Keep inviting me to things. Keep asking for help and letting me do the things I know I can still do. I am willing to pay the piper the next day. I will continue to throw the parties we do, and enjoy every minute I can.
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